Pregnancy Brain

Here’s some fuel for the “pregnancy brain” myth.
My wife who is 22 weeks pregnant came home from the grocery store with a large bottle of rum. The rum is for the egg nog (yes, we are giving in to the incontrollable urge to act like it’s Christmastime even though there’s still two more weeks of November left.) Egg nog is really best with a little splash of rum; otherwise it’s kind of like drinking melted ice cream. Anyway, I was making lunch for the fam (boxed Kraft 3 Cheese Macaroni, hot dog, with celery and peanut butter on the side.) Sarah was putting away the groceries and one of the bags was only placed about half-way on the table. We watched in horror as the large bottle of rum slipped out of the bag and smashed onto the kitchen floor. I was reminded of the scene from “A Tale of Two Cities” where a cask of wine is accidentally dropped in front of the DeFarge’s wine shop and all the peasants are lapping up the wine off the road. I fought the urge to lap up any rum due to the tiny shards of glass.
That’s not all.
With the rum mopped up and the kitchen smelling a bit like a frat house. We were getting all set for a typical Monday lunch watching the Simpsons. Standing over the coffee table where our 3 bowls of mac and cheese were waiting to be eaten, my wife was attempting to open the large jar of peanut butter. Suddenly, the jar of peanut butter allegedly bit my wife on the pinky finger. I watched as in slow motion my delicious bowl of 3 cheese macaroni with sliced hot dog was launched into the air by the naughty peanut butter jar.
“What happ’n, Mommy” said Joanna.
I picked it up off the ground and ate as fast as I could in order to preserve the 30 second rule. Most of my meal was salvaged (though I had to pick out a few hairs) and my wife who felt rather guilty offered some of Joanna’s 3 cheese macaroni to make up for my loss.

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  1. #1 by Heidi Vincent on November 19, 2007 - 3:07 pm

    Hilarious! My sister, Heather, said she would get in her car ready to go to the store and couldnt remember why she was going to the store in the first place.

  2. #2 by Rinnie on November 19, 2007 - 5:18 pm

    Oh, sorry!!! I’ve definantly had days like that, although now I can’t attribute it to pregnancy!

  3. #3 by Dad on November 25, 2007 - 3:22 pm

    “That’s not all.” Great story, well written!Guess you’ll carry those booze bottles with two hands from now on.

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